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The Oatmeal is hilarious at 2 AM.
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While editing The Sun Also Rises, Maxwell Perkins had to decide how to handle the many obscenities in Hemingway’s text. He planned a lunch with the author and kept a list of words to discuss with him.
While Perkins was at lunch, Charles Scribner came looking for him and, finding his office empty, consulted his calendar. It read “shit piss fuck bitch.”
When Perkins returned, Scribner said, “You must be exhausted.”
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A social-bloggy thing I got here.
To be honest, I feel self-conscious blogging for my faceless audience out there. You’re anonymous, silent, and judging, while I sit here typing about my feelings and the thoughts that I usually keep quiet about. I end up questioning the words I write, always wondering if I bored someone or made some heinous grammar mistake that will haunt me for an Internet-age eternity.
As a matter of fact, what am I supposed to talk about? My day?
I don’t know. I always felt like these fancy “blog” things were diaries for the exhibitionists. Frankly, I have nothing interesting to exhibit—nothing worth being immortalized in this pseudo-diary of mine.
So here’s the story of my day:
I woke up groggy after staying up until 2:30 for my econ project + my calc final. Since that particular final was 2nd period that morning, I needed to stay the fuck up during my test in spite of my sleep deprivation.
Sadly, I was out of energy drinks. I compensated by eating a packet of Nescafe instant coffee that was packed with pure, concentrated coffee and sugar. Disgusting? No, it was delicious.
Now that I think about it, I want to end this post here with that particular message. It’s important to understand that you don’t dilute your packets of instant-coffee with water; eat them like they’re PixyStix for grown-ups. You’ll thank me later.
"Igby: It’s ironic that the first time in my life that I feel remotely affectionate for her, is when she’s dead.
Oliver: You beat up her corpse.
Igby: I know, but after that."
Igby Goes Down
(A truly dysfunctional Salinger knock-off flick for the jaded 18-24 crowd. I like it.)
